Soccer games aside (and this weekend we had four), Friday night began the two part culmination of months of rehearsals, hours looking for a bathing suit that, to quote my daughter, "highlighted, but didn't SELL", scouring the web for silver cowboy boots (props to eBay), and nearly 1,000 additional miles on my minivan - yes, it was finally time for the Miss Austin / Miss Teen Austin USA pageant.
I've mentioned previously that Rudy and I have been perplexed by Culley's desire to engage in these. Yes, she has modeled. Yes, she is easy on the retinas. Yes, she looks great in a bathing suit / evening gown / potato sack.
But she has also made a career out of making sure people know there is a big, beautiful brain behind the big, beautiful eyes. As she once growled at someone when she was only two years old and being fawned over, "I'm SMART too!"
Being stared at just isn't important to Culley. It never has been. In fact, until the past year or so, she would simply go to school and try to blend into the paint on the wall - as I have come to learn from her experiences, being pretty AND nice somehow makes for an easy target to other girls whose main claim to fame is their ability to carry a gargantuan, hairy, green eyed monster on their back and still walk upright.
Does she like to dress cool, hip, fun? Of course - she's a teenaged girl. Does she have a lot of friends? Yes. And they come in all shapes, sizes, interests, backgrounds. Her only requirement? That they treat people nicely. (Believe me, she is her mother's daughter when it comes to how people treat one another in this world.)
She is a voracious reader. She is a thinker. She loves discussing chemistry, history, politics, religion, ancient civilizations.
On the flip side, she is a goofball. She is a jokester with a rapier wit. She loves American Idol, Project Runway, every movie Will Ferrell makes. (Also, like her mother, laughter is a big priority in her life.)
So, when I say that Rudy and I have never truly understood why she began entering these things, it's only because, as opposed to majority of girls who do enter, Culley's life has never been focused on the pageant world.
For so many of them, THIS is what they do. This is what they have done since they could walk. They (their parents) spend thousands of dollars each pageant on private coaching - walking, interview skills, wardrobe consultations, wardrobe, registration fees, make-up, and so many hair extensions they make Paula Abdul look like a chemo patient.
Culley just enters. Period. No behind-the-scenes coaching. No angst over which color spackle to layer on. She found her evening gown within five minutes of walking into a dress store in the mall - no boutique-upscale-encrusted-with-so-many-sequins that-under-the-stage-lights-it-looks-battery-operated dress.
Her personal interview dress came from Target: $24.99
She works with the hair that naturally grows out of her head, strapping in nothing additional.
She is in theater, so she does understand stage lighting and the need for slightly heavier make-up, but still refuses to shellack her face. In fact, her only true concession to "pageantry" is that she does wear a single set of false eyelashes.
But I digress, back to Friday night...
The preliminaries consisted of an opening dance number in which all of the Miss and Miss Teen contestants, identically outfitted in jeans shorts, silver boots, their bathing suit top, and a black blouse tied under their bosom - danced and had their moments in the first spotlight of the contest.
It actually was impressive. That many girls hitting their marks, doing choreography that would make the American Idol Group Song look like a 3 year old ballet recital.
And Culley blew us away.
She's not a dancer. Has never taken lessons. But apparently, all those months of Peter Pan dance rehearsals paid off. She was amazingly comfortable with her body, self assured, sassy even in her expressiveness.
To explain what a departure that was, let me just say this: I glanced over at Rudy as he watched, and with tears in his eyes, he said, "That's my baby? LOOK at her!"
(And it began to dawn on me what she WAS getting out of the pageant experience...)
The night moved through the bathing suit competition - and props to all these girls. It takes more than just a deep breath to get up there and parade in front of hundreds of people.
She looked amazing. Head up, smile bright, making easy eye contact with each judge. And gone was the nervous, fast pace of her first pageant a year ago. In its place was a confident stroll, nothing rushed, an understanding that she owned the stage at that point - so enjoy it.
Evening gown is truly one of the best parts of these things. I'm a girl, and I have no problem admitting that I like a pretty dress.
She was lovely as ever. She had pulled her hair softly back, and had eschewed the stereotypical pageant girl choice of satellite dish sized earrings encrusted with enough cubic zirconia that under the lights they could signal the space shuttle, opting instead for small antique earrings which have been in Rudy's family for years.
Again, as she glided across the stage, doing her turns, even coyily glancing over her shoulder at the judges during one of them, that realization of what she is actually gaining from these things crystallized even further.
CONFIDENCE. That beautiful skin of hers? She has finally grown into it. If nothing else, this process has helped her understand that being beautiful and being smart are not mutually exclusive. Watching her on that stage, I could see in her eyes, she knows exactly who she is.
At the end of the evening, two awards are given out by the judges: Photogenic (based on their photos), and Bathing Suit (based on their appearance). Last year, in her first pageant, Culley was recognized in the Top 3 photogenic. She was thrilled - first pageant and all.
Friday night, she was pulled down for the Top 3 in Bathing Suit. (By the way, she doesn't get that long torso, and her stallion length gams from me - all props to Rudolf.)
Nice evening for her.
Saturday morning, the largest component of the scoring took place - personal interview. Each girl appears in front of two panels of judges who ask any number and type of questions - some based on sheets they have filled out with hobbies, interests, etc - some general questions. The idea is to see how they think on their feet, present themselves, string words together in a thoughtful way.
Probably the most frightening aspect of competing for 90% of the girls who enter.
Not so, Culley.
She ended up speaking French with a judge, making him laugh, no less. Spoke of the world not protecting its children when asked what her "platform" would be, and blew them away by reciting Pi to 26 digits - what she lists as something unusual about herself.
Yes, Pi, as in the mathematical number - not apple, cherry, custard...
She came out with a smile on her face, which is all I could ask for. She felt she did her best, no regrets.
Saturday evening was the finals. Repeat of the opening number, then based on the scores from bathing suit, evening gown, and interview - the group was wittled to a semi-final of 10. She made the first cut. And beamed.
The semifinalists then competed in their evening gowns again, which lead to a cut to the final five.
Note: Culley is a realist. She sets reasonable goals, and doesn't tie her ego to outcomes. She placed in the Top 10 last year, did well at the State level this past November, and hoped to finally make the Final Five this time around.
She did.
We cheered. She lit up like a Christmas tree.
Final five meant she got to answer questions on stage. This is not a problem for Culley. Each girl had to approach a podium, face a group of five "reporters" and answer as many questions as she could in one minute. She was eloquent, funny, and got through at least five.
The night moved on, the Miss finalists faced the same "press conference", then it was time to refill the stage with all the contestants, announce the order and crown the new winners.
But first, they awarded Miss Congeniality – voted on by all the contestants – this award is given to the girl the other girls believe is the friendliest, most helpful, genuine.
And they called our daughter’s name.
Final Five AND Miss Congeniality? (Catch me, Sandra Bullock.)
Culley received a trophy and a bouquet of flowers, and was beaming. She could see us from her vantage point on the runway, and we were beaming right back.
And then the final announcements began. And the girl Culley considered to be a shoo-in (and to be honest, this young lady considered herself to be, too), had her name called. Before Culley.
I don’t know who was more shocked.
Culley stood there with the final four, and then her name was called – our beautiful daughter made third runner-up in the Miss Austin Teen USA pageant.
And she looked THRILLED.
Standing next to the girl who had been called before her, the contrast was stark. Both girls did not win the crown, but where the other girl was scowling, Culley was all lit up from inside.
The new Teen Queen was crowned (Culley actually liked her, which means a lot to her in these things – she wants to see truly nice people do well), the new Miss Austin was awarded, and then it was over.
Lots of photographs were taken of the final five in each group. Of Culley with her Miss Congeniality Miss counterpart (Culley liked her too), Culley with the departing Miss Austin, Culley with the new Miss Austin, the New Miss Austin Teen, Culley with the pageant director. Culley with little girls who wanted to bask in the glow.
And then, holding her armsful of flowers, and not one, but two trophies, we saw her quietly sneak off the stage.
She just POOF – disappeared.
We waited, wondering where she went. And about ten minutes later, the auditorium still fairly full of people mulling around, pictures still being taken on stage, etc, she walked back in, her small suitcase behind her, her dress in its bag over her arm, her other arm full of flowers and trophies.
She was in shorts.
And ready to go home.
I looked her in the eyes – you know the look a Mom gives a daughter which asks a million questions, the most important one being "Are you OK? – and she smiled through wet eyes.
I grabbed her and said, "It’s OK, let it go."
And this insanely beautiful daughter of ours, who came close enough to the crown this time to actually taste it, who could not be faulted for wanting to cry in disappointment, said, "No, I’m HAPPY." And then holding out the Miss Congeniality trophy, added, "Look what I did."
No Culley, look what we did. Your father and I. We are raising a child who couldn't care less about what people see on the outside. We are raising a daughter who is moved to tears because people recognize what is truly beautiful on the inside.
On the drive home she had two things on her mind: McDonald’s and sleep. We bought one, headed home to the other.
As I tucked her in, I told her how proud we are of her. And she murmured, "Me too. But on to the next thing. I have a bunch of homework to finish and auditions for Senior Directed plays this week."
Yes, her life is full and she is focused. Carry the happy memories with you, Culley, and move forward to the next thing with a smile on your face, and peace in your heart.
That’s our Miss Congeniality.
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